Dear God

I saw this amazing website today: http://www.dear-god.net/

Being in the online marketing field, I'm always scouring the web for the next hip and cool internet fad. And though I'm not big on God generally (I am atheist), I can't deny that this site is mega powerful and engaging. Also, I frequently like to live in fantasy non-realities of my own design (remember that panacea for feelings rubbish?) so today I am taking a trip down the "righteous path."

This particular entry made me giggle. If only...

Dear God,Could you send me a new boyfriend please? The last one
was rubbish, frankly, and could have benefited from a rethink of his sideburns,
amongst other things. The quality isn't what it used to be either and I find I
have to dispose of them far more quickly these days. AND they're more expensive.
So much for quality control. So, yes, a new boyfriend (preferably Joaquin
Phoenix but I'm happy to road test others) would be smashing. Please have him
washed and brought to my tent. Thanks ever so.Baroness Von Urquhart -
London

So, I might as well give it a try. He/She has never answered me before, but given my mild hangover from last night's Live Warfield concert, I could use the distraction from work for a bit.

Dear God,
Could you please tone it down a notch on this whole "being a grown-up" thing? Frankly, it is exhausting and not much fun. Bills, cubicles, complicated relationships, silly expectations about marriage and kids, Crystal City...i mean, come on?! I could really use a break. I'm not saying I want to go back to being a kid. I just want being a grown-up to be a tiny bit easier. Perhaps you could send me a condo? That would be fun. Or maybe you could send me a sexy guy who adores me and has proper manners and doesn't mind that I'm a little eccentric? Can he be an orphan? I sense that in-laws were
probably created by the other one down below. Also, could you make walnut cream
sauce and goat cheese ravioli fat-free please? I really love it the way it is,
but summer is coming and that whole swimsuit thing is kinda scaring me.

Thank you very much.
Rachael – Washington,
DC

Oh, and could you please make January 20, 2009 come a
little faster. I'm really tired of that guy. I'm sure you are too.