Biodiversity

I am in a book club and am notorious for reading only one out of every 3 books they choose. I don't know where these women get their time, but somehow they can devour one book per month easily. I finally finished reading our February book, The Omnivore's Dilemma, nearly 3 months late. And since I'm so late and therefore have no one to talk about the book with, I'll talk to myself about it. I've gotten rather good at that actually. All those fascinating and spur-of-the-moment conversations one would normally have with a roommate or significant other…yeah, I have to have with myself due to my constant state of aloneness. Olive helps some but she is decidedly not an omnivore and would prefer a carefully prepared steak for every meal. So I'm on my own with this one.

This book was fascinating in so many ways, but I won't bore you with a book report. Rather, I usually relate to books by marking passages that make me think about a situation completely non-related to the book's topic. This characteristic as a reader also makes me unsuitable for membership in a book club. What else is new?

One passage I marked was in the section of the book where the author is spending time on a sustainable and rotational farm, quite different from the industrial farms from which we usually must get our food. He is commenting on how the farm has an unexpected plot of land devoted entirely to a standing forest. Cows and chickens need grass to thrive and you can't grow grass (or any other crops) in a forest. So one would think that that land should probably also be used for pasture. More forest means less grass…grass and trees are antagonists in the success story of a farm, right? It turns out that the forest supplies a vital storage facility for moisture, wind protection, homes for birds that are natural pesticides for crops, and other resources the farm needs. In fact it is in the edge of the forest, the place where farm and forest overlap, that are the most productive and full of life. It is in the in-betweens and overlaps that nature finds its most healthy state of being.

This could be considered some sort of post-industrial Siddhartha story, the middle path or the theory of moderation. Indeed, it is. But, it also got me thinking about what in my life could be elevated by some complimentary overlap in another person. (See why I'm hopeless in a book club discussion?)

I'm inherently lazy, non-competitive, and susceptible to boredom. I am sensitive and demanding. I can be dramatic and moody. But, under the right circumstances, I am also passionate, affectionate, and indulgent with my friends and lovers. I love having people around me and make pleasing them one of my top priorities. I like to inspire and support my friends and lovers to follow their dreams and make themselves happy. I don't have surface-level relationships…if you're in, you're in for real and for good and I have no inhibitions showing my adoration. I think these characteristics are o.k. They aren't well-rounded by any means, but at 27, I think I can work with it.

What is noticeably missing is the overlap of qualities I don't possess. Much like the thriving grey area between forest and farm, what are things that I need provided to me and what can I provide? Of course, I can't put my finger on the myriad of characteristics that could help me elevate my life to a higher sense of meaning and happiness. The zillions of facets of human personality are a bit much to cover in a blog. But, I can say that after a weekend watching everyone in couples parading around in puppy-love bliss, my missing overlap was felt a bit more than usual.

So, I will now focus on identifying my ideal overlap. I'm not sure whether it will look more like a forest or a farm, but this should be a little more fun for my girlfriends and I…we've grown a little weary of the make-believe personal ad drafted on bar napkins. The good news is that I have lots of friends and their personalities compliment my mine immensely. From my mega-motivated boxing partner who gets me off the couch by hook or by crook to my sister who is a poster-child for responsibility and adultness to my organized girlfriend who makes me at least attempt participation in this stinking book club…I clearly know how to choose the cream of the crop when it comes to girlfriends. Even my furry little friend Olive sitting next to me reminds me that I'm lovable even if I'm hungover and haven't taken a shower for 2 days. Though i'm still looking for my own metaphorical farm-hand/forest ranger, my overlap is clearly very rich and diverse as it is.