The detox program was delivered yesterday in 18 colorfully terrifying bottles. The realization that I am to have no booze, food, or fun for the next few days began to set in. Cashew milk, really? How do these healthy people do it? The instructions are simple: Don't consume anything except the specially prepared juices in a specific order and water with lemon. No problem for someone who gets normal amounts of sleep, water (without whiskey), exercise, and nutritious food. (I just had trouble spelling nutritious which is indicative of my familiarity with it.)
In preparation, I completed the following tasks:
- "Cleaned" out cookie and milk supply for breakfast
- Gave dog a bath (she'll be used as a stress ball over the next few days)
- Put clean sheets on bed
- Ate an inappropriate amount of pasta for lunch
- Ate an amazing, amazing dinner at a new Thai restaurant
- Ate a spicy chocolate cake ball
- Drank 3 bottles of wine
- Stayed up until 3:30am
Ok, I'm ready. I can totally do this.
Juice #1 down. It wasn't terrible. It wasn't butternut squash and goat cheese ravioli with walnut cream sauce either. But, the Donkey episode of Ab Fab is still funny for now and the sky appears to still be blue. Only 68 hours left.
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