Saturday, May 29, 2010

Moving too fast

One of my most difficult-to-hide-from-the-general-public personality defects is my inability to make decisions. I attribute this to my astrological sign. It's not my fault I was born a Libra.

Anyway, the other day, in preparation for my move, I attempted to purchase a car. My mom found it in Omaha and because I trust my mom's judgment completely, I considered buying it even without seeing it in person. The car looked beautiful in pictures and was exactly the type I wanted...small, red, hatchback, manual, low miles, ok price. My mom confirmed the car moved fast which unexpectedly kinda gave me a hard on. The salesman was also unexpectedly kind which calmed my nerves.

For three days, I was nearly consumed with this decision. I investigated every aspect...car reviews, insurance companies, car transport options, Kelly's Blue Book, loan managers. I knew this car inside and out. I decided to buy it! I would call the dealership first thing in the morning.

Naturally, the car had been purchased by someone else just 12 hours before I called.

In stunned disbelief, I thanked the man and sat quietly for a minute. I had been so proud of myself for finally feeling confident about a 60 month commitment. But, I also managed my disappointment by reminding myself that I, Rachael, cannot and will not make uninformed decisions. I cannot be rushed. When the time is right, I'll decide and not before.

This can be infuriating to my friends, lovers, and used car salesmen, I realize. But, like other things in life that moved too fast for me, stepping aside and letting them pass is, frankly, the only way I know how to react. Like other things in life, if it didn't work out, it must not have meant to be.

However, the next time a find a sporty little red rocket on wheels, I will wrestle anyone who tries to snatch it out from under me. I mean it.

Don't Wait Too Long by Madeleine Peyroux

1 comment:

Vinnie said...

A manual transmission? You're a rebel!

-- Vinnie